Anyway, here’s the thing…my life is weird. It is a dichotomy which might give a lesser person whiplash. It certainly hasn’t done much for my sanity–or perhaps it has. Maybe it’s saved me, because when one part gets too annoying, or stressful, or [insert adjective here], I can swing to the other parts of my life and breath a sigh of relief at the serenity of it all, embracing the pure oppositeness.

What am I talking about? Let’s take a look at today and I’ll show you.

This morning I had an internet browser window open to the Inn and Spa at Norwich with another window open to my 5 friends’ many, many emails in my inbox with another friend on the phone trying to figure out our girl’s trip away.

Swing to the other browser I had open and you’ll find the site for the American Quarter Horse where I was downloading their PDF about Cowboy Manners and procedures throughout history. (Hey, it might make for good blog or research materials or at least an interesting read).

Guess which browser window made me feel serenely calm and happy when I looked at it and which one had me ready to tear my hair out?  Am I weird that I’d rather stay home in my little farmhouse on my little farm and read about cowboys from days gone by? That the planning of this relaxing spa trip may put me on Prozac before we’re done? Probably. I guess I don’t do anything normally. My Netflix queue looks like it belongs to a schizophrenic. I’ve completed the entire season of Animal Planet’s The Last American Cowboy (a reality show about 3 Montana cattle ranches trying to survive), and I’ve also watched the entire season of the PBS Masterpiece Theater historical British show Downton Abbey. And I found both equally fascinating.

Anyway, I guess balance is necessary. After all a girl can’t live in PJs and survive on cowboys alone. Once in a while I have to leave my house and see actual live people and do things, if only to build fodder for more books to write. But sometimes, it would be really nice to hide out for a while. After all, that cowboy manners PDF is still waiting to be read…

Cat

Last night US military forces rescued two civilian aid workers who were being held by Somalian ruffians who like to fancy themselves pirates. Of course, the superior military forces saved the one American woman and one Danish man, to the demise of the majority of the captors, and I’m happy for it.

Here’s what’s pissing me off–this was not a one man, or even a 6 man, show. Reports indicate it was a SEAL team who led the rescue, some reports say SEAL Team 6, which means Twitter and every news broadcast is chock full of SEAL Team 6. What I’m saying is, first off there are many highly trained special forces, so why must we single out Team 6 to the exclusion of all else? And even more important, though I don’t know for a fact, I think it’s logical to assume that helicopter that dropped those SEALs was not piloted by a SEAL. More likely a Navy or a USMC pilot. What about that pilot–that ‘normal’ non-SEAL hero? What about the guys (meaning guys as well as girls) that made sure that helo was in working order? Or the guys that cooked those SEALs and that pilot and those helo mechanics their dinner before they went out? Or the guy who cleans the damn toilets and showers that make conditions livable for them all on that base in hotter-than-hell Djibouti on the Horn of Africa?

Why, oh why must we make this a one man show? It is not a one man, or one team, or one branch of the military, show, and though I appreciate the need for good military public relations for the citizens of this country, what about the esprit de corps of our troops? Why aren’t they all heroes for what they do, no matter how ‘media-worthy’ it is?

Soapbox Kitty, out.

1- Things change. What was true yesterday is no longer true today, and if history has shown us anything, it won’t be true tomorrow. Which brings me to the next point…

2- Never stop learning and never ever assume you know it all. Because, as I mentioned above, things change, but…

3- As much as things change, there will also be things that remain the same. I’m thinking particularly of legacy publishing as I type this, holding on to the way things used to be by the skin of its teeth. Yes, it may be making small concessions here and there, but basically, still the same. But as I said…for the sake of repetition, please refer to point #1.

4- You have to put your best foot forward at all times. You never know who’s watching. Honestly, you really never know, and what you are doing when you think no one is looking could be the defining moment in your life. It could make or break your career. Did you write a free short story just for fun? Did you put in out there for the public to read? Then that piece of writing better be the best damn thing you can put out there. It had better be as good as what you would send to your editor. It better be as good and as clean as it would be if it went through edits and proofing because, as I said, you really never know who’s out there reading it, now do you? The same goes for web presence. What’s out there on the web, be it your own domain, or blog, or Facebook or Twitter (especially FB & Twitter) it better represent you the way you want to be represented to the world, because, you just never know.

5-Luck is nothing without hard work, persistence and talent. Luck may drop an opportunity into your lap but if you let it sit there and don’t act on that opportunity, it will shrivel up and die as surely as that houseplant you forgot to water. In fact, I’m starting to wonder if there is such a thing as luck at all, because it is more likely the hard work, persistence and talent brought that opportunity to you in the first place.

6-When others talk, listen. You can decide whether to accept their opinions/suggestions later, but at least hear them out, because you never know from where the next gems of wisdom will come and because (see #2) you can never stop learning because (see #1) things never stop changing.

7- Always check your email spam folder. Sounds silly. Sounds strange. But believe me, Microsoft’s “junk” may be the thing that could change your life. And I’ll leave you with that and the promise of an explanation…soon.

Cat

As I pry my eyes open, both from the lack of sleep and the false eyelash glue from the New Years Eve festivities of last night, I can’t help but reflect on the year that’s past. 2011 was a hell of a year, and more than I ever expected. Some things I’m still having trouble wrapping my head around. Some things are still works in progress and my superstitions won’t let me talk about them for fear of jinxing them. But here is a list of some of the random, but memorable things from the year past.

• A fan telling me when they Google ‘hot naked cowboys’ my picture comes up right along with the hot naked cowboy pics.
• The cute cable guy calling his romance novel-loving mother to tell her I was an author and her not only knowing my name, but having read my Red, Hot & Blue series.
• Signing a contract for a super secret and very exciting project with the lovely and talented Amy Reiley (chef, author and owner of the Eat Something Sexy blogs).
• My first original self-publishing eBook ‘experiment’ which sold 6,000 copies in 6 weeks.
• Watching, live and in person, the bull rider I sponsored compete in the NBR Finals in February in North Carolina.
• Hitting an all new sales high, thanks to my publisher Samhain making my TREY a free read on Amazon.com back in March.
• Watching my fellow Samhain Publishing eBook authors hit the NY Times Best Seller list and knowing it is possible!
• And finally, the opportunity which I hate to say ‘fell into my lap’ since I worked damn hard to prepare for this moment, but it did kind of fall from the sky–an amazingly, unprecedented opportunity. I’m going to have to work damn hard to take advantage of it, and  I still won’t talk about it since it could amount to nothing at all OR it may make my career… Anyway, yeah, this surprise opportunity which happened just before Christmas, may be the most amazing of all and I hope to one day soon have an announcement for you. But even if I don’t, that’s okay, because it was amazing, nonetheless.

There are so many more things, meeting some of my PBR (professional bull riding) fans live at Madison Square Garden last January, having the father of one of the top riders in the country fact check my last cowboy release, the surprise gifts my generous readers send me, meeting so many great people both live and online. It all adds up to memories I’ll always cherish.

Happy New Year to all. If 2012 holds even half the magic that 2011 did, we’re in for one hell of a year.

Cat

Christmas time–it’s been crazy, hectic, and at times a bit of a blur this year. As I sit nursing my hangover from last night’s festivities, and plot my day for tomorrow–post office, food store, cooking, wrapping–I reflect on the past week.

My friends and I have already exchanged gifts. As we speak I’m wearing my new leopard print lounging pants from my friend Donna, she knows me so well. I’m now the proud owner of a new bluetooth keyboard for my iPad from my friend Leesa and her kids so I don’t have to curse the virtual keyboard anymore. And even more amazing, my friend Whitney procured the luxury box at Madison Square Garden and 14 of my closest friends and I will be watching the opening event of the 2012 Pro Bull Riders season from our own skybox with private bathroom, fridge and wet bar. And from my fans, surprise envelopes are arriving in the mail steadily. A custom-made leather cowboy boot Christmas stocking with my name on it from the book club I visited on Long Island. A cowboy boot ornament for my tree from my bull rider-loving fan Shannon, who knows both my own boot and cowboy fetishes. And just today I got an iPad case with my book cover on it sewn by Helen, a reader who makes beautiful quilts and other fabric works of art. Merry Christmas to me!

My gifts to my friends were hits as well, if I do say so myself. For Donna, a chef’s wife who just began a food blog, I found a handmade bracelet on Etsy made out of an actual fork, bent and curled into a unique beautiful piece of wearable art. Whitney, a serious connoiseur of homemade margaritas, got a lime squeezer, agave and tequila from me. Leesa, a Scrabble efficiando and the person who keeps getting the 7-letter words and pissing me and Whit off, got Scrabble pajama pants.

That’s just a sampling of the holiday goodies and treats that brought joy to me and hopefully to my friends. I wish all my readers good friends, good food and good gifts!

Cat

I read my iPad app FLIPBOARD for food inspiration, and I get inspiration from Eat Something Sexy’s very own Amy Reiley (who FYI has a new cookbook release coming out next month!).

Anyway, I’ve recently made Spiced Rosemary Nuts (William-Sonoma), so easy and so impressive and tasty. I brought them to both a Friday Night Dinner with Friends as well as to a holiday party housewarming and they were a hit both places. I’m going to try Amy’s Hot Honey Nuts recipe from the monthly aphrodisiac newsletter that just came out a few days ago for tonight’s Friday Night Dinner with Friends.

The other night I made Roasted Carrot Soup (Food 52). It came out really tasty but more importantly I’m thinking something that colorful HAS to be good for you too. And yesterday, while watching that new foodie show on ABC, The Chew, I was inspired to–this is big so get ready–change out of my pajamas, go to the food store, and buy the ingredients for the Swiss Steak with Arugula Salad they made on the show. Anyone who knows me at all knows how huge it is. I rarely leave the house (or change out of PJs) unless it’s absolutely necessary, such as the horse is totally out of feed and is threatening to break out of the paddock and storm the house.

So yeah, I’m procrastinating writing right now (I even vacuumed in an effort to kill time) but I’ll get back to it, one word at a time. And in the meantime, I’ll keep my eye on the inspirational blogs of Food 52, William Sonoma, and our own Eat Something Sexy and hope the creativity spills over from the kitchen to the laptop.

Cat

Sometimes you have to recharge. Yes, I have too much to do for my writing. Yes, I’m ignoring the cat hair dust bunnies chasing the cats around the hardwood floor in the living room. No, I haven’t put the storm windows back in for the winter yet. But yes, I did drive to New Hampshire directly from my writer’s conference in Albany, traversing 3 states on scenic Rt 7 (thank you, TomTom, GPS from hell, for deciding to send me on the scenic route rather than on Rt 90 and 91). I arrived in Keene, New Hampshire in time for margaritas with the girls by 7:15 PM Friday night.

We were there for the annual Keene Pumpkin Fest and it was beautiful. Once I stopped twitching from the 3 hour drive and the sheer number of people in the tiny town of Keene (land of the traffic circle and pedestrian crossing), once I’d parked my car for the night and picked up my drink, I had a chance to look around and appreciate everything, from the historic buildings, to the quaint storefronts, to the 16,000 carved pumpkins that lit up the night making everything appear magical.

We stayed until Sunday and did it all–karaoke at the townie bar, shopping at vendors in the street selling both wares and fried foods, coffee with the pajama-wearing Keene State students at the local coffee shop, pumpkin beer at the hotel bar, and then again at the Brewery for lunch, shopping for “Nice Pumpkins” Pins (double entendre intended) , Keene Pumpkin Fest tote bags, “I Got Smashed at Pumpkin Fest” T-shirts, even pumpkin earrings. We were the invading tourists some of the locals run from until this annual event ends. I came home tired but happy to have been there, bringing home both memories and purchases.

We went with only the girls and we remarked often, particularly in the football stadium-sized Yankee Candle Company store, good thing no boys were with us. Nope. They just wouldn’t have gotten it.

My favorite purchase?  The maple syrup infused whisky I bought at the State Liquor store that I’m most excited to try. We were in New England, after all. Who could drive through Vermont and not buy something maple syrup related!

Mental batteries recharged, I woke this morning ready to tackle the work. Sometimes it’s what you gotta do.

For more information on this annual event visit http://pumpkinfestival2011.org

Cat

I’ve been traveling a bit lately. A visit one night to a book club on Long Island. A live reading at the Happy Ending Lounge in Manhattan. This upcoming Friday I’ll be in Albany lecturing for a day on writing panels. But that’s not really all that time consuming–a day here, a day there. It’s the contracts and the deadlines looming before me that have me up at night.

It’s October 18th and I haven’t done the math but December is right around the corner. I somehow have to get my out-of-print holiday eBook out in time for the big it’s Christmas and Amazon has a new $79 Kindle out rush. Then I have to whip out a 50K word novel that I promised to write in a moment of weakness, or perhaps insanity. Then there is still the 5th bull rider book for my Studs in Spurs series that I promised my regular publisher. I want that to be 60K words so critics stop calling those books ’short stories’… sigh. Somewhere in between there I have two super secret projects to work on. One is time sensitive, and one not so much. One is not contracted, the other is, but I tend to work with the same level of dedication no matter what. Then there’s a bunch of book bloggers who were kind enough to ask me to guest on their blogs and I, of course, said yes (please refer to the title of this post).

Now, if November and December weren’t hellishly busy, I might not worry. But of course there’s Thanksgiving, and Christmas decorating, and shopping, and wrapping, and entertaining and visiting. Then if Lyndhurst calls me to play again for their holiday tours, I’ll have to brush up 2 books worth of harp music I haven’t played in a year in preparation for 2 live performances weekly beginning Thanksgiving weekend and not ending until Christmas.

So what has all this taught me? Me, the queen of procrastination, has no time to procrastinate until after the New Year. Maybe that’s a good time for a non-procrastination resolution. I guess we’ll see…

Cat

What do spammers get out of it? I haven’t precisely figured that out yet. I think professional spammers somehow monetize how many places they can place someone’s link around the web? Just guessing, but the way they go about it is pretty amusing. Yes, I’ll admit, in the beginning the spammers pissed me the hell off, especially the day I got 200. But now, I just kinda laugh at them and have learned that if I turn off comments on older posts they aren’t as aggressive.

Or perhaps like fine wine, I too am mellowing with age. So just for fun, I bring you some Sunday funnies. For reference these were all (along with about 2 dozen more) placed on the UNPLUGGED post from last week about technology in our lives, not that these random spam commenters know what it was about, nor do they care.

English as a second language… The spammers try, they really do, but the lesson here is you can’t use Google translate without it being pretty obvious. DELETE.

“extremely great publish, i definitely enjoy this internet site, preserve on it”

“This site is my breathing in, rattling superb layout and perfect articles”

The insulters… I’m really not sure how they think insulting the blog author will get their comment posted. Perhaps it’s a bad attempt at being controversial and they think I’m going to publish their comment just so I can contradict them? Ah, silly spammer, this author’s credo is “never engage”. Good try. DELETE.

“I must say, as substantially as I enjoyed reading what you had to say, I couldnt help but lose interest after a while. Its as if you had a excellent grasp to the topic matter, but you forgot to include your readers. Perhaps you should think about this from more than 1 angle. Or maybe you shouldnt generalise so a lot. Its better if you think about what others may have to say instead of just heading for a gut reaction to the topic. Think about adjusting your own thought process and giving others who may read this the benefit of the doubt.”

The flatterers… They’d be great on a blind date perhaps, but just pointlessly and randomly telling me how great my post is does not hide the spammer shining through. Sorry. DELETE.

“You should take part in a contest for one of the best blogs on the web. I will recommend this site!”

“I was very pleased to find this web-site. I wanted to thanks for your time for this wonderful read!! I definitely enjoying every little bit of it and I have you bookmarked to check out new stuff you blog post.”

The tech support question… They think you’ll be so into helping them solve their problem, you’ll not notice they’re secretly a Link Building Service (which is also their name…hmmm…)

“Alex (Said he knows you) told me that you could help with a “permalink” problem I was having with wordpress.  Can you take a look for me?”

This last one also incorporated use of the personal approach, but unfortunately I don’t know any ‘alex’. Sorry…

The helpful spammers... They’re only here to help me: build my SEO, get more followers from their publicizing me on their sites, make money, etc. How selfless of them. What nice folks… DELETE.

“To: Website Owner! I like your WordPress blog and I found your page thru Google so I thought you could make some bank off of this.”

“Hello there, Excellent Blog post! I have just retweeted this valuable post to my followers.”

The completely off topic… Remember this post was even near the topic of cooking.

“Nice twist on the common recipe! Mind if I take some inspiration from this? ”

The blatant… these folks don’t even try. Come on… give me something. DELETE.

“100% Free Internet Phone Calls…..  http://www…”

It’s a question I find I can no longer avoid asking.  A week with friends in a house at Lake George with zero cell phone service (thank you T-Mobile) and WiFi that moved at glacially slow speeds taught me I could survive (in spite of the technology withdrawal) without being connected to the outside world. Of course the recent hurricane was moving in to the area that week and my mother was freaking out she couldn’t get me. Then another friend forgot I’d be away and when I finally got signal I had about a dozen texts and voicemails ranging from puzzled, to annoyed, to “are you ignoring me?”. But anyway, yes, we have become very dependent on technology, and after that week of forced disconnect I ordered the iPad 2 with WiFi AND 3G… “As God as my witness, I’ll never go internet-less again!”

So when my friend called last Thursday and said our friend with a beach house wanted us to visit before they shut the house down for the winter, and asked if I was free to go this weekend, I said hell yeah I was available, then I began to pack. We were at the beach for exactly 24 hours. We were driving through the Hamptons Saturday morning on our way out to Amagansett at the exact same time we were driving through them coming home on Sunday morning. Yet in spite of the short trip, I went with a bag of electronics nearly as large as my suitcase for the weekend.

Laptop. Charger. Cell phone. Charger. eReader. Charger. iPad. Charger. iPod Touch. Charger. Digital Camera. Charger. EarBuds. I weighed my laptop case. It was not quite 13 pounds but it sure as hell felt heavier. Perhaps it was mental weight I was feeling. Who knows? Now I can’t complain too much because it’s technology that allows us to keep in touch with each other… We can text or Facebook to keep in touch with our friend who lives way out on Long Island. I could snap a picture of Gosman’s Dock on the iPad and post it right to Twitter or Facebook for all to see. I could take dictation and type up the recipes and a new blog post for my friends new food blog, right there on the laptop as she was cooking in that gorgeous kitchen overlooking the Atlantic Ocean. Then I could snap a picture of the meal she made us and use the Wordpress App to upload it directly from the iPad to her food blog post, no wires necessary. Then later, out at the Cross Eyed Clam, I was able to add the new friends we met right to my Facebook from my iTouch. Who needs a phone number scrawled on a cocktail napkin when there’s free WiFi and the Facebook App? (Okay, admittedly I did witness an exchange of a phone number the old fashioned way that night, but it’s nice to know there are options now!)

Are we too plugged in? And if so, isn’t it really just another way for us to communicate and remain closer to each other no matter how far removed? Maybe it’s not such a bad thing after all.

Cat